Day in day out we see different interpretations of the same incidence producing different perspectives because of the observers' personal experiences.
Not right.
Not wrong.
Just different.
However, many of these interpretations become a problem - usually for other people - because of the observer's insecurity and bias.
The real question is why make your own shortcomings someone else's problem?
The answer is awareness, acknowledgment, acceptance - or the lack of it.
Many a times, the person is not even aware that he/she has made it someone else's problem.
And sometimes, eventhough he/she is aware of it, refuses to acknowledge that it is a problem.
And worse, hard headed stubbornness prevents one from accepting that he/she is the problem.
And what follows in amendment to advance totally is dust to the wind!
Many is blinded by arrogance and numbed by insecurity to see all this.
And the lowest hanging fruit or easiest way is to blame it on others.
It immediately no longer is their problem.
In the hierachical world, whether corporations or community, this has become a disease.
Sometimes it even brings an incentive like paying millions to CEOs who cannot perform to leave.
That does not only bewilders me but also bother me like hell.
However, it remains the easiest way to transfer one's shortcoming to another and make it their problem.
What these people does not understand is that the world is getting smarter, people are having more choices, and they have the opportunity to not choose them anymore.
So wake up you insecure pitiful people.
Learn not to blame.
Learn to embrace.
Learn to appreciate.
Learn to be humble and in so doing become great!
Thursday, August 13, 2009
Monday, August 10, 2009
As I was passing... these 47 years!
Many celebrates the date when they come into this world...
Many does not have a chance to celebrate it...
Many may not have a chance to celebrate the next...
Yet many hate to know that another is coming.
Whatever it may be, it is not something that is within your control...
And I do not mean the cake nor the decorations!
Birthdays... why is it of such significance to our life... long or short?
Is it a countdown to death or a count-up to living?
Birthdays I believe, was created to denote a coming of ...
Life - during times when living pass your first year was a miracle;
Success - when you have made it... and you have lots of people whom admire you and look up to you;
Seniority - when you now sit, rather than stand at ceremonies;
Demonstration of love - by your family and friends;
Pain - of older and less healthy age and independence.
Life, as it is, is a continuum .. of course until the day that it is terminated.
Therefore birthdays should be celebrated based on level of happiness and to have health to enjoy it.
Birthdays therefore should be celebrated everyday.. to give thanks to what we have and what we can give; that we can love someone who loves us back, and to have yet another chance to live our life the way we want to and not just being alive.
Birthdays should include moments of quiet reflection upon the years you have chalked up, moments to speak to yourself which we do so little these days; moments to be aware of your past, acknowledge your good, bad and ugly; accept your failures; amend to do better and then advance to being a happier person to spread joy by making others happy!
Now that is a birthday worth celebrating, everyday, no matter how long or short one lives.
Therefore birthdays, like lives, are not about the passage of time and the wrinkling of skin but the way one lives it as you enjoy a smooth and happy ride through the experiences of life!
Many does not have a chance to celebrate it...
Many may not have a chance to celebrate the next...
Yet many hate to know that another is coming.
Whatever it may be, it is not something that is within your control...
And I do not mean the cake nor the decorations!
Birthdays... why is it of such significance to our life... long or short?
Is it a countdown to death or a count-up to living?
Birthdays I believe, was created to denote a coming of ...
Life - during times when living pass your first year was a miracle;
Success - when you have made it... and you have lots of people whom admire you and look up to you;
Seniority - when you now sit, rather than stand at ceremonies;
Demonstration of love - by your family and friends;
Pain - of older and less healthy age and independence.
Life, as it is, is a continuum .. of course until the day that it is terminated.
Therefore birthdays should be celebrated based on level of happiness and to have health to enjoy it.
Birthdays therefore should be celebrated everyday.. to give thanks to what we have and what we can give; that we can love someone who loves us back, and to have yet another chance to live our life the way we want to and not just being alive.
Birthdays should include moments of quiet reflection upon the years you have chalked up, moments to speak to yourself which we do so little these days; moments to be aware of your past, acknowledge your good, bad and ugly; accept your failures; amend to do better and then advance to being a happier person to spread joy by making others happy!
Now that is a birthday worth celebrating, everyday, no matter how long or short one lives.
Therefore birthdays, like lives, are not about the passage of time and the wrinkling of skin but the way one lives it as you enjoy a smooth and happy ride through the experiences of life!
Saturday, July 25, 2009
Yasmin - a recognition for bringing us back in touch with ourselves.
Many said that as we grow up, we surpress many of the feelings we have when we were young!
It is called the lost of INNOCENCE.
Well, why?
It sometimes is deemed impolite to say things we can when we were small; too politically sensitive to discuss a topic we feel passionate about; express our feelings to another the way we feel it or simply talk about a person uncensored.
We have lost BEING OURSELVES for reasons of sensitivity, culture, shame ...
The magic of Yasmin is to help us relive all these through advertisements and movies - away from ourselves but still can be enjoyed by all. She has allowed us to say things without saying; doing things without starting the deed and feel things which we are conditioned to feel as taboo or simply forgotten.
Yasmin, you have touched many lives in the course of yours.
Through your back-to-human-basics on relationship between human beings, you have conjured and re-activated the feelings we have somewhat lost or shy and afraid to talk about.
Your MERDEKA series of adverts and lately FUNERAL for MCYS is clear examples you take life to the highest level of maturity by bringing it back to the lowest common denominator of basics.
Your SEPET touched many hearts, erasing the color sensitive lenses we have been taught to have; your TAN HONG MING is simply magical to let us re-discover the innocence we still have in us. Your CHINESE NEW YEAR - OLD FOLKS HOME puts success and happiness as far apart as it should ever be and bring it back together again by redefining them.
You have given us so much in ways you will not ever imagine.
Families are touched by FUNERAL. Relationships are made possible by SEPET. And communities move to a new level of relationship through your MERDEKA ads.
You have given us back the sense of being OURSELVES.
I thank you and will miss this Merdeka more than all previous as you are not here to help us retell our stories in ways we are afraid to do.
It is called the lost of INNOCENCE.
Well, why?
It sometimes is deemed impolite to say things we can when we were small; too politically sensitive to discuss a topic we feel passionate about; express our feelings to another the way we feel it or simply talk about a person uncensored.
We have lost BEING OURSELVES for reasons of sensitivity, culture, shame ...
The magic of Yasmin is to help us relive all these through advertisements and movies - away from ourselves but still can be enjoyed by all. She has allowed us to say things without saying; doing things without starting the deed and feel things which we are conditioned to feel as taboo or simply forgotten.
Yasmin, you have touched many lives in the course of yours.
Through your back-to-human-basics on relationship between human beings, you have conjured and re-activated the feelings we have somewhat lost or shy and afraid to talk about.
Your MERDEKA series of adverts and lately FUNERAL for MCYS is clear examples you take life to the highest level of maturity by bringing it back to the lowest common denominator of basics.
Your SEPET touched many hearts, erasing the color sensitive lenses we have been taught to have; your TAN HONG MING is simply magical to let us re-discover the innocence we still have in us. Your CHINESE NEW YEAR - OLD FOLKS HOME puts success and happiness as far apart as it should ever be and bring it back together again by redefining them.
You have given us so much in ways you will not ever imagine.
Families are touched by FUNERAL. Relationships are made possible by SEPET. And communities move to a new level of relationship through your MERDEKA ads.
You have given us back the sense of being OURSELVES.
I thank you and will miss this Merdeka more than all previous as you are not here to help us retell our stories in ways we are afraid to do.
EULOGY - one for yourself
EULOGY are usually great things you say about someone after they have passed on ... and therefore the person have no chance to hear what you say about them. What a waste!
So for a reflective moment, think of what you THINK your eulogy would be ...
Here is mine .. about me ... by me ...
He came with nothing.
He went away with love - not for what he has done but for what he has learnt.
In his process of learning, he has given us challenges, some we hate him for. some that brings a smile in our hearts. Flamboyant to a fault - not in dressing but in style.
Never know what NO is but understand when you said it.
We criticize his being, we hate his guts, we admire his determination and laugh at his impatience.
For whatever it is worth, he has brought a moment of hope in moments of despair; a moment of anger to reflect on moments of calm and appreciation, a moment of smile in times of need and pain.
We hate him for taking it all away now.
We love him for giving us a chance to experience it, with him.
Go forth my friend.
Bring more the next time you come around.
So for a reflective moment, think of what you THINK your eulogy would be ...
Here is mine .. about me ... by me ...
He came with nothing.
He went away with love - not for what he has done but for what he has learnt.
In his process of learning, he has given us challenges, some we hate him for. some that brings a smile in our hearts. Flamboyant to a fault - not in dressing but in style.
Never know what NO is but understand when you said it.
We criticize his being, we hate his guts, we admire his determination and laugh at his impatience.
For whatever it is worth, he has brought a moment of hope in moments of despair; a moment of anger to reflect on moments of calm and appreciation, a moment of smile in times of need and pain.
We hate him for taking it all away now.
We love him for giving us a chance to experience it, with him.
Go forth my friend.
Bring more the next time you come around.
Saturday, July 18, 2009
ARROGANCE ... confidence or the lack of?
In our lifetime, I am sure we have been given abundance of opportunity to be successful and have equal chances of meeting people who have been.
In the so called successful crowd, we also see those whom we term ARROGANT and those who are nice.
The question is why are people arrogant?
I put it to a game of golf. Par. Under. Over.
And in this game, over is bad.
As one sets expectations in life, one can also mis-judge and set wrongly .. bring par higher. To me arrogance comes when the arrogant person achieved what he/she thought she cannot .. and if this gets repeated, he/she gets the feeling that he/she is invincible and un-failable! Like hitting under-par with birdies all the time!
So it is all in the EXPECTATION and the TREATMENT of success..
Like life, nothing is guaranteed ... Neither is success.
Therefore arrogance can be short-lived and erodes real friendship .. that may lead to future successes.
In the so called successful crowd, we also see those whom we term ARROGANT and those who are nice.
The question is why are people arrogant?
I put it to a game of golf. Par. Under. Over.
And in this game, over is bad.
As one sets expectations in life, one can also mis-judge and set wrongly .. bring par higher. To me arrogance comes when the arrogant person achieved what he/she thought she cannot .. and if this gets repeated, he/she gets the feeling that he/she is invincible and un-failable! Like hitting under-par with birdies all the time!
So it is all in the EXPECTATION and the TREATMENT of success..
Like life, nothing is guaranteed ... Neither is success.
Therefore arrogance can be short-lived and erodes real friendship .. that may lead to future successes.
21/12/2012 ... what if it is true?
Much have been talked about the end of the world ...
During my almost 47 years of living on this planet, it has been talked about a number of times .. sometimes perpetrated by religious fanatics who is too eager to punish what they called sinners!
Now comes a new one ... 2012!
December 21, 2012!
There are sites that proclaimed that the Mayan and the Chinese I-Ching has predicted it ... even to the degree that a film is made in its name, hopefully to enjoy release before the blessed date!
There are counter arguments in http://www.greatdreams.com/2012.htm which said it is untrue.
Just for the next 5 minutes, indulge in a scenario that it is true.
WHAT WILL YOU DO?
Will you live the next 3 years plus in absolute enjoyment?
This is a Bucket 1 incident (please refer to my earlier blog entry on Of Death. Of Life...).. canNOT be changed.
Will you see life differently?
Will you love more and hate less?
Will you smile more and frown less?
To a small degree, July 1, 1997 for Hong Kong has similar feeling.
Although it is not the end of the world - maybe it was to some - it has a taste of terminal to it.
So on December 20, 2012 - what will your thoughts be?
Huddle your love ones in front of the TV?
Surrender your fate and faith to God?
Feel regretful about things you did not do?
Feel regretful of things that you have done?
What if there is a December 23, 2012 ... will this moment make us a better race and making the blue planet a more gracious society of love, care and life?
And regret that it needs such a reminder to wake us up again.
During my almost 47 years of living on this planet, it has been talked about a number of times .. sometimes perpetrated by religious fanatics who is too eager to punish what they called sinners!
Now comes a new one ... 2012!
December 21, 2012!
There are sites that proclaimed that the Mayan and the Chinese I-Ching has predicted it ... even to the degree that a film is made in its name, hopefully to enjoy release before the blessed date!
There are counter arguments in http://www.greatdreams.com/2012.htm which said it is untrue.
Just for the next 5 minutes, indulge in a scenario that it is true.
WHAT WILL YOU DO?
Will you live the next 3 years plus in absolute enjoyment?
This is a Bucket 1 incident (please refer to my earlier blog entry on Of Death. Of Life...).. canNOT be changed.
Will you see life differently?
Will you love more and hate less?
Will you smile more and frown less?
To a small degree, July 1, 1997 for Hong Kong has similar feeling.
Although it is not the end of the world - maybe it was to some - it has a taste of terminal to it.
So on December 20, 2012 - what will your thoughts be?
Huddle your love ones in front of the TV?
Surrender your fate and faith to God?
Feel regretful about things you did not do?
Feel regretful of things that you have done?
What if there is a December 23, 2012 ... will this moment make us a better race and making the blue planet a more gracious society of love, care and life?
And regret that it needs such a reminder to wake us up again.
Friday, July 17, 2009
RESPECT - bestowed and not claimed.
Aretha Franklin coos ... All I'm askin' (oo)... Is for a little respect when you come home (just a little bit)
RESPECT is to be BESTOWED and EARNED and not ASKED OF nor CLAIMED.
Many makes the mistakes that this comes automatically with age and with status.
Well, pirated versions of it maybe but not the true genuine ones.
RESPECT is a weird element.
It is a REALIZATION of someone's value and dignity and trust ... and is BESTOWED upon those who so deserves it.
An incident in my niece's school put me on the blood-trail of comments about RESPECT.
A so-called educator tried educating the students on RESPECT by literally bitching about why she was NOT invited to a gathering ... because she is a teacher! Kids nowadays sees far more than when I was their age; learn more; experience more and definitely know more. By humiliating a child into truly respecting oneself is not the name of the game, not anymore.
Many who share the box where I tick my age will tell you that in our days, RESPECT sometimes is equated with FEAR. At least the representation of RESPECT at that time. But deep in our hearts, we know who we REALLY respect.
So RESPECT = FEAR is so last century!
Welcome the new era of RESPECT = I dig you! I know what you are about! And I like it! is in.
RESPECT is to be BESTOWED and EARNED and not ASKED OF nor CLAIMED.
Many makes the mistakes that this comes automatically with age and with status.
Well, pirated versions of it maybe but not the true genuine ones.
RESPECT is a weird element.
It is a REALIZATION of someone's value and dignity and trust ... and is BESTOWED upon those who so deserves it.
An incident in my niece's school put me on the blood-trail of comments about RESPECT.
A so-called educator tried educating the students on RESPECT by literally bitching about why she was NOT invited to a gathering ... because she is a teacher! Kids nowadays sees far more than when I was their age; learn more; experience more and definitely know more. By humiliating a child into truly respecting oneself is not the name of the game, not anymore.
Many who share the box where I tick my age will tell you that in our days, RESPECT sometimes is equated with FEAR. At least the representation of RESPECT at that time. But deep in our hearts, we know who we REALLY respect.
So RESPECT = FEAR is so last century!
Welcome the new era of RESPECT = I dig you! I know what you are about! And I like it! is in.
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