Saturday, July 25, 2009

Yasmin - a recognition for bringing us back in touch with ourselves.

Many said that as we grow up, we surpress many of the feelings we have when we were young!
It is called the lost of INNOCENCE.

Well, why?

It sometimes is deemed impolite to say things we can when we were small; too politically sensitive to discuss a topic we feel passionate about; express our feelings to another the way we feel it or simply talk about a person uncensored.

We have lost BEING OURSELVES for reasons of sensitivity, culture, shame ...

The magic of Yasmin is to help us relive all these through advertisements and movies - away from ourselves but still can be enjoyed by all. She has allowed us to say things without saying; doing things without starting the deed and feel things which we are conditioned to feel as taboo or simply forgotten.

Yasmin, you have touched many lives in the course of yours.

Through your back-to-human-basics on relationship between human beings, you have conjured and re-activated the feelings we have somewhat lost or shy and afraid to talk about.

Your MERDEKA series of adverts and lately FUNERAL for MCYS is clear examples you take life to the highest level of maturity by bringing it back to the lowest common denominator of basics.

Your SEPET touched many hearts, erasing the color sensitive lenses we have been taught to have; your TAN HONG MING is simply magical to let us re-discover the innocence we still have in us. Your CHINESE NEW YEAR - OLD FOLKS HOME puts success and happiness as far apart as it should ever be and bring it back together again by redefining them.

You have given us so much in ways you will not ever imagine.

Families are touched by FUNERAL. Relationships are made possible by SEPET. And communities move to a new level of relationship through your MERDEKA ads.

You have given us back the sense of being OURSELVES.

I thank you and will miss this Merdeka more than all previous as you are not here to help us retell our stories in ways we are afraid to do.

EULOGY - one for yourself

EULOGY are usually great things you say about someone after they have passed on ... and therefore the person have no chance to hear what you say about them. What a waste!

So for a reflective moment, think of what you THINK your eulogy would be ...

Here is mine .. about me ... by me ...

He came with nothing.
He went away with love - not for what he has done but for what he has learnt.

In his process of learning, he has given us challenges, some we hate him for. some that brings a smile in our hearts. Flamboyant to a fault - not in dressing but in style.

Never know what NO is but understand when you said it.

We criticize his being, we hate his guts, we admire his determination and laugh at his impatience.

For whatever it is worth, he has brought a moment of hope in moments of despair; a moment of anger to reflect on moments of calm and appreciation, a moment of smile in times of need and pain.

We hate him for taking it all away now.
We love him for giving us a chance to experience it, with him.

Go forth my friend.

Bring more the next time you come around.

Saturday, July 18, 2009

ARROGANCE ... confidence or the lack of?

In our lifetime, I am sure we have been given abundance of opportunity to be successful and have equal chances of meeting people who have been.

In the so called successful crowd, we also see those whom we term ARROGANT and those who are nice.

The question is why are people arrogant?

I put it to a game of golf. Par. Under. Over.
And in this game, over is bad.

As one sets expectations in life, one can also mis-judge and set wrongly .. bring par higher. To me arrogance comes when the arrogant person achieved what he/she thought she cannot .. and if this gets repeated, he/she gets the feeling that he/she is invincible and un-failable! Like hitting under-par with birdies all the time!

So it is all in the EXPECTATION and the TREATMENT of success..

Like life, nothing is guaranteed ... Neither is success.
Therefore arrogance can be short-lived and erodes real friendship .. that may lead to future successes.

21/12/2012 ... what if it is true?

Much have been talked about the end of the world ...
During my almost 47 years of living on this planet, it has been talked about a number of times .. sometimes perpetrated by religious fanatics who is too eager to punish what they called sinners!

Now comes a new one ... 2012!
December 21, 2012!

There are sites that proclaimed that the Mayan and the Chinese I-Ching has predicted it ... even to the degree that a film is made in its name, hopefully to enjoy release before the blessed date!

There are counter arguments in which said it is untrue.

Just for the next 5 minutes, indulge in a scenario that it is true.

Will you live the next 3 years plus in absolute enjoyment?
This is a Bucket 1 incident (please refer to my earlier blog entry on Of Death. Of Life...).. canNOT be changed.

Will you see life differently?
Will you love more and hate less?
Will you smile more and frown less?

To a small degree, July 1, 1997 for Hong Kong has similar feeling.
Although it is not the end of the world - maybe it was to some - it has a taste of terminal to it.

So on December 20, 2012 - what will your thoughts be?
Huddle your love ones in front of the TV?
Surrender your fate and faith to God?
Feel regretful about things you did not do?
Feel regretful of things that you have done?

What if there is a December 23, 2012 ... will this moment make us a better race and making the blue planet a more gracious society of love, care and life?

And regret that it needs such a reminder to wake us up again.

Friday, July 17, 2009

RESPECT - bestowed and not claimed.

Aretha Franklin coos ... All I'm askin' (oo)... Is for a little respect when you come home (just a little bit)


Many makes the mistakes that this comes automatically with age and with status.
Well, pirated versions of it maybe but not the true genuine ones.

RESPECT is a weird element.
It is a REALIZATION of someone's value and dignity and trust ... and is BESTOWED upon those who so deserves it.

An incident in my niece's school put me on the blood-trail of comments about RESPECT.

A so-called educator tried educating the students on RESPECT by literally bitching about why she was NOT invited to a gathering ... because she is a teacher! Kids nowadays sees far more than when I was their age; learn more; experience more and definitely know more. By humiliating a child into truly respecting oneself is not the name of the game, not anymore.

Many who share the box where I tick my age will tell you that in our days, RESPECT sometimes is equated with FEAR. At least the representation of RESPECT at that time. But deep in our hearts, we know who we REALLY respect.

So RESPECT = FEAR is so last century!

Welcome the new era of RESPECT = I dig you! I know what you are about! And I like it! is in.

Of death. Of birth. And everything in between.

Life is a full circle.

In the words of 'comedian-writer' Emma Bombeck, you know when your parents are old when you become their parents! Or is it when YOU are old!

In the words of my esteemed grandmother, "You come with nothing. You go with nothing. Enjoy life and enrich others," becomes a sublime understanding to help, to not-sweat-the-small-stuff, to experience and to live and not just being alive.

In my terms, one has to come to terms with 2 buckets - one that you can change and one that you cannot. And use the CAN to flank the CANNOT.

Profound? I have no idea.
Inspiring? Hardly.
Pragmatic? Easily so.

As I age, or rather amass more enriching experiences - some happy, some bitter, some ugly, some scary - I have come to understand that many tends to spin their life on top of this tip of the bull's horn which eventually hurts only oneself. Many tend not to be able to see beyond the WHATs into the WHYs. And keep asking why about the WHATs, which sometime may yield the answer one is not looking for ... nor is prepared to accept. So then why ask WHY about the WHATs?

Life as it is, is basically a good second-by-second undertaking - willingly or otherwise - happenings around us, parallel to the passage of the dimension called time.

Tick-tock, tick-tock. A countdown to the end. A count-up to experience. You decide.

Therefore if you cannot be in any control of time passing (bucket 1 = canNOT change), then use bucket 2 = CAN change to make it pleasurable, enriching and put smiles on faces!

So start your day with not what you dislike. Start your day with what can you do about what you dislike. You will be surprised at the panaromic view you will have to the myriad of choices you have wgich you may not be aware of. May be as simple as SMILE to YOURSELF. Or as complex as solving life threatening issues! You choose!

Life is too short to be angry, especially with yourself. And for the vain folks, it is definitely too short to grow wrinkles over!

And hey, who says that LIFE has to end when you die!

Sunday, July 5, 2009

Of hair and bare ...

Today marked many wonderful milestones ... my niece's 11th birthday, the 25th anniversary of my career and my first endeavor into shaving my head to raise funds for the Children's Cancer Foundation!

Why did I do it - many asked me.
Courageous act - many commented.
Great deed - some exclaimed!

Well, it was neither any of that and all of that.

Why? Well, too many painful memories of people I know, people whom I know who knows someone, who suffers from this dreadful and live robbing disease.

Courageous? Not at all! It is just cutting hair. It will grow back. Unlike the pain and the hope for a tomorrow that may never come. I am into it to learn and experience.

Great deed .. well... the learning certainly is. But it will never be like any of those who are going through it; the families who lost the opportunity of another day; the kid who may not see another hair-cut!

I did it for me!

I did it to realize the pain.
I did it to learn from the anguish.
I did it to share in the agony.

I did it in hope that they can do it ... yet again... in losing my hair in hope that they can gain theirs .. again!